00:33:13	dbml@bitstream.net:	What is the difference between empathy and compassion.
00:34:20	dbml@bitstream.net:	If there is a difference, which to you think is more beneficial?
00:39:52	Paige Harley:	Love this! Spot on… “neutral” is not the best word as we continue to grow as mediators.., impartial makes prefect sense as I have been stumbling around looking for a better word
00:46:03	Joanna Roth:	I relate to this perspective of orienting around agency. I empathetically imagine what is happening with each client, to get an idea of what I might do as an intervention.  It is in support of finding a resolution that will work for them, and they will be confident taking authorship of.  If I rely too much on my empathy, I worry that I am trying to charm them into a settlement.
00:48:51	dbml@bitstream.net:	Here, here!!! I love Mr. Bush!  Be present, believe they have their own power of agency.
00:52:12	Jennifer Kresge:	You are so right Larry.  Our cognitive abilities are what guide the process.  Paying attention to our emotions is essential.  Being culturally perceptive and aware in the moments of conversation sits beside our presence.
00:54:41	Jennifer Kresge:	Neurobiologically, our emotions have the ability to overun our cognitive capacity.  My belief is that it is necessary to be aware of this and pay attention to what's facilitating your interaction with the clients. Consider this before the clients enter the room.
00:56:48	Jennifer Kresge:	I ask myself, as I sharing this information about me for the benefit of my clients or me.  If the later, I do not share about me.  If I believe it will be helpful to my clients I will share, and will tell my clients something about myself and tell them why I am sharing this.
01:05:23	Jim Melamed:	Empowerment
01:06:12	Jim Melamed:	Help folks to be at their best . . . they do not commonly come to us in this date . . . so let’s help them be their resourceful best
01:06:29	Jim Melamed:	“in this state”
01:07:17	Linda Gryczan:	Re: Empathy. So often in divorce mediation, one person left the marriage long ago, and the other is devastated. In a money dispute, one person feels cheated, the other may purely about the money.
01:07:41	Linda Gryczan:	In these cases, showing empathy can look very partial, except if shown in caucus.
01:11:11	Sam Timbrook:	So often the important thing is timing.  Sam from Columbia, MO.
01:16:27	Jim Melamed:	In addition to supporting agreement, do we seek to empower? help folks to be at their best?  this is not commonly how they come to us, so, in addition to supporting agreement, do we also as mediators want to be assisting participants to be at their best?
01:18:51	Aloysius Goh:	@Jim, Absolutely. At least for me, apart from settlement, and oftentimes more than settlement, an indicator of success is whether the participants felt that they out-achieved, they struggled and succeeded in moving out of their comfort zones.
01:19:00	Jennifer Kresge:	I think of myself as a tool.  My role is to facilitate their expression of needs and wants and assist in the negotiation of differences.
01:20:47	Jennifer Kresge:	First need is to develop a relationship with the clients.  That is really what we're talking about.  How do we enable this to be a relationship of trust and change.
01:20:58	Tess Worrell:	I do think some personal experience helps people be their best. Limited sharing often normalizes the myriad of emotions clients feel which can them help them process  those emotions more effectively. Because so many clients have said, "This is not who I am!" in response to their own behaviors in mediation that surprised even them, some degree of ability to get back to their best selves gives some power back as well. If sharing helps in that, it seems beneficial.
01:21:26	Aloysius Goh:	@Jennifer, I couldn't say it better 😊
01:22:09	Genesis Mediation LLC:	Totally agree with you Tess Worrell.
01:24:08	Genesis Mediation LLC:	I always speak to my mediation trainees about being a catalyst for change.
01:24:59	Jennifer Kresge:	Larry ~ great point.  If we choose to do nothing, we choose to do something.
01:26:53	Chip:	Awesome talent on this panel.  Great discussion.
01:29:58	Chip:	Honesty, humility, and skill.  Core ingredients. 
01:30:22	Linda Gryczan:	I once was mediating after a sandwich with WAY too much garlic. When I realized trying to talk without exhaling wasn't working, I told the clients my situation, they both laughed, one pulled out mints, and they came to resolution.
01:34:26	Dan Gulden:	Before empathy or agency, it seems to me must be the mediator deciding to and being fully present in the room for the parties.
01:34:44	Tess Worrell:	Genesis's point of "you can recover" is so key. We all have moments where something didn't work. The ability to step back, consider, and then move forward differently is so important. I think it also helps to keep in mind that we are equipping the clients to address their situation in the way they consider best. The process is up to us--the result is up to them. Keeping that in mind, I think, helps us recover because our focus is on "how do I equip the clients" not "how do I get a resolution"?
01:38:28	Jennifer Kresge:	Recently worked with a theatre company ~ mediated their disputes on managing their roles in the company.  Not sure who gained more, me in witnessing their culture ~ or them in the resolution that developed.
01:42:02	STEVEN BOYD MENACK A Better Solution, Inc.:	Yet another excellent and informative Town Hall!!  Thank you, Michael, and thank you to our wonderful experienced, charismatic, much appreciated and esteemed presenters!!!      - -APFM President Steve Menack